Swine Flu: The Musical

I don't know how to tell you this, but I sort of love having Swine Flu.

Don't get me wrong, the 102 fever, body aches and chills, highly unattractive fits of coughing and resulting abdominal pain are no fun...and I don't want to downplay the fact that my bout with H1N1 has been largely uneventful compared to some of the very unfortunate stories I hear about this national emergency. My doctors quickly called my prescription for Tamiflu into the pharmacy near my apartment. I have health insurance which covered much of the cost of the prescription. I also have lots of sick time I can use and an understanding supervisor who sent the nicest e-mail when I learned of the diagnosis. And, my loyal and brave friends picked up the necessary meds (and the most delicious Welch's grape juice) and delivered them directly to the door of my apartment.

...But I wouldn't be doing my part as a optimistic blogger and self proclaimed jokester if I didn't spend part of this time quarantined in my apartment pointing out the many fantastic aspects of Swine Flu:

• The fun really began when the doctor told me I couldn't leave my apartment for at least five days. Really? I am the most overscheduled person I know. This is the #1 best excuse to cancel all plans and stay in bed for a very extended period of time. It is almost as if I have been overbooking as a way of preparing to be quarantined for my entire adult life. (Seth and Stacy, I promise we will reschedule your engagement photo shoot--I was so looking forward to it.)
• Tamiflu (the drug that the CDC recommends as treatment of Swine Flu although according to all the research I've done, and to Rabbi Michael N., it is actually not an effective treatment) makes you sick to your stomach which sometimes leads to weight loss. Don't mind if I shed a few lbs when all is said and done...
• My facebook post announcing the illness received an unprecedented 31 comments (this does not include all of the other comments that were posted on subsequent status updates). So thanks, H1N1, for providing me an excuse to reconnect with friends in Florida and Fairfax, Israel and Indiana (and making me feel really popular). Some of the comments were hilarious (you can read them here).
  
• Gold stars to Tovah P. and Hanaa R. for pointing out one of my favorite silver lining aspects: at least I don't need to wait in line for 18 hours to get a vaccine! (In case you didn't know, H1N1 is like Chicken Pox, once you get it you're immune...although this could be disproven and then blown completely out of proportion on the local news like everything else related to the Swine, so who knows.)
• I feel major solidarity with NPR's Scott Simon. His daughters are currently home with H1N1 and his essay this week is a sweet look into the way his family is coping. (Thanks to Neil S. for sending this my way.)
• Speaking on Neil S., he also wins the award for best Swine Flu related twitter message:
  

• Since I'm not able to actually leave my apartment to do anything, the manicure I've had for well over a week hasn't chipped at all! Even though I am too exhausted to even dry my hair (in fact taking a shower is basically as much activity as I can handle for an entire day), whenever I glance down at my hands I feel momentarily pretty am then reminded of the beauty services offered in the outside world (and all the possible polish colors I will try when I am finally unquarantined).
• I've had the opportunity to send really dramatic e-mails with titles like "PUBLIC HEALTH WARNING: I have Swine Flu" to everyone I have hung out with in the recent past. (Thanks to most everyone who has responded graciously to these notes, especially Barb W. who simply wrote "seems inevitable these days..." You made me feel much less self conscious about my condition.)
• Reclaiming the term Swine Flu is an excellent use of my quarantined time, too. I have tried to reclaim other phrases in the past, but I feel it is my personal responsibility to really bring the throwback name (as opposed to H1N1) into vogue. H1N1 just sounds like 1) government propaganda or 2) a sugar substitute. And the Halloween costume possibilities associated with Swine Flu are MUCH better.
• Did you hear about my tech meltdown earlier this week? (My blackberry and laptop crashed...on the same day.) So, my Swine Flu "vacation" has provided ample time for me to get used to my temporary laptop. Why does it take getting used to, you may ask? Because it is the size of a computer made for Barbie. (The glasses shown in this photo are my everyday glasses and pictured here so you can get a clear idea of the scale of this tiny but adorable laptop.)
  

• Did you know that you can get almost anything delivered right to your door? In addition to my dad delivering homemade chicken soup (he asked if he should wear a mask in the elevator, I couldn't tell if he was kidding but said no anway), I've also gotten some saltines and Lysol and fifteen gallons of juice from Peapod.com. And before the Tamiflu nausea set in and I decided I needed some Ben and Jerry's at midnight on Friday, DCSnacks.com was my go to delivery service. So, a big thanks to you, Swine Flu, for adding yet another reason why I love living in this glorious city. In the words of my soup cooking father, "The more you pay, the less you have to do..." and when you have Swine Flu, no price is too high for Ben and Jerry's at midnight.
  

Two Only Sort of Related Footnotes

My paternal grandfather, Abraham Goodstein, would have been 88 yesterday. I had planned to go to a Jewish deli with a friend and sample all the types of chopped liver (as was his usual routine at any establishment serving chopped liver)...alas my Swine Flu quarantine got in the way. I can tell you that if he and my dad had been in the same place yesterday, while the chicken soup production was underway, he would have had very specific instructions for the entire process, especially the packaging and transport. I was reminded of him as soon as I unwrapped the tupperware my dad dropped off, as it was so well packaged not an ounce was sacrificed in transport.

I am also remembering Paul and Sheila Wellstone today, as it is the 7th anniversary of their death. For my entire college career, I had a Wellstone quote at the bottom of every email I sent. It read "If we don't fight hard enough for the things we stand for, at some point we have to recognize that we don't really stand for them." I met Paul Wellstone twice and was hit hard when he died. During our second meeting, I remember him asking me what my name was (which seemed odd since I was in the middle of a very long line of people waiting to meet him at a fundraiser for his campaign). When I told him, he proclaimed that "it was like we were related... GOODstein, WELLstone," then he gave me a huge hug. If he were alive today, I am sure he would be making sure healthcare (including the Swine Flu vaccine) were accessible to all Americans.